ihearttimnally

(Edit)

Naets back.

I am going to keep my phone off for the next few days, just to sort a few things out, and grieve, but I just want everyone to know that I am alright, or at least I will be alright.

I miss Berlin.

I am in an obscene mood. I can't even describe it. I just passed out on my bed for a half hour. I did not eat at all today, I just forgot to. Thankfully my roomate is cooking some veggie curry thai thing. I'll eat that. Fria is the best roomate ever. I need to work more overtime. My hair is looking horrific, five inches of roots is not attractive. Ugh. I need more hats. 10 more days of poverty until I get my first debt-free paycheck. Naet moved to Brooklyn, but he is still a half hour away from me (?).

My life is droll.

Naet might be moving in with me. Joy.
Snoring all night long, yay!
I moved to Williamsburg.

I do have a job now. Also a place to stay.

I want to thank everybody who has given me a shoulder to cry on, also those people who have had to deal with my incessant whining. I know I have been difficult.

They just moved another person into my apartment. I didnt even know she lived there until she started interrogating me about when I showered in the morning.

I am moving out in 2 weeks.

I know this is a retarded thing to be angry about, but the stupid people living in my appt., threw out my lush soap.

It is 200 in the morning, I am in the apple store on 5th ave.

MY PHONE FELL OFF OF A 10 STORY BUILDING AND I LOST EVERYONE'S NUMBER...PLEASE CALL ME SO I CAN HAVE YOUR NUMBER AGAIN.

I am at work. I am waiting for a thing to print. I think I am going to go to Lush today, so I can waste more money.

I have an apartment, I have a job, but instead of just fucking being happy, I am going to bitch about how I dont have anyone.

I absolutley hate spring. I just realized I was the only person out of all of my friends who does not have a signifigant other. I cant stand walking through this city anymore because everyone is holding hands. I want to be ok with myself. I want to be confidant and strong enough not to need someone holding onto me at all times. I feel like such a failure for feeling the way I feel.

blah. I need to cuddle.

This past week:

I saw a dead person lying in a pool of his own blood on tuesday, that was great. It was even better to see the people eating their breakfasts 3 feet away from him.
I went to the Lotus and got trashed off of a bottle of grey goose, which led to a most interesting ride home. Also, an interesting hangover.
I was woken up to the sound of someone breaking into a car, to which I shouted out my window, stop breaking into that car, or at least turn the alarm off, and went back to sleep. I am such a helpful citizen.

Well, I moved to Brooklyn. I have no furniture.

I hate everything. I hate that i cannot get a real job. I hate that no guy wants to date me yet they line up for dumbass girls. I hate my artistic block. I hate going to sleep alone. I hate life.

what the hell is with 21+ guys dating 16 yr old girls?


How can they possible fucking relate to them.



reason 47683278409283538292013489748275862893885 I hate men.

I am going to bitch about something.


Why do people come to me looking for relationship advice? I am the absolute last person in the universe you want to ask. I am still deeply hurt/ pining/ being totally pathetic about a relationship that ended over a year ago. I am horribly mean to men, actually I am probably quite emotionally abusive to them at this point, and discard them after a period of two weeks, max. I hate them and their stupid games. Why does this qualify me to tell any human being how to maintain a healthy relationship? Can people not see a train wreck when they are staring right at it?

For example, my friend Emily just broke up with her lame boyfriend. He was a loser of the highest caliber who was monitering what she ate because he "didn't want a fat girlfriend" and making up stupid lies that the "doctor" told him to prove her infedelity ( she never cheated on him) . My advice to her was "puncherize his face, and if you cant do it, I would be honoured to". I thought that would pretty much state that it was a good thing the relationship was over, and to cease all contact with that disrespectful oaf. What does she do? Keeps tabs on him through someone else, she couldn'e even stalk him on myspace or facebook like a normal human. This really pisses me off. She comes to me seeking advice which I am evidently underqualified to give, and then ignores it, in essence wasting my life.


Speaking of wastes of life, men, I hate them with the passion of a thousand suns. My vow of chasity is going along swimmingly (take that people who said I wouldnt last until febuary, it's march) aside from a few little innocent make out and cuddle flings, my emotional contact with said despicable creatures has been blissfully limited. I am really mean though, and that I do not like.

I chopped all of my hair off. To my chin.